“This is unacceptable.” I caught myself saying these very words out loud on Monday after my morning meditation. I was very frustrated because fluid still clogged my left ear and the only thing I could concentrate on was my eardrum throbbing in time with my heartbeat. There was no pain, but it was so annoying! It had now been three weeks since I first started feeling symptoms of a cold, so I decided that this was unacceptable. As soon as I heard my words I had to laugh. How many times have I shared with my coaching clients that the first step in making change and achieving peace is acceptance? And there I was declaring something unacceptable.
Accepting something is not a sign of weakness or even approval. It is merely surrendering to what is. I can argue all I like with what is, but it still is, regardless of my opinion. It would be like going to the beach, putting my hand up, and commanding the ocean waves to stop. I can try it, but the waves will continue to roll in whether I want them to or not. Getting angry at the waves won’t change anything. Telling the people around me how terrible those waves are for not stopping won’t change anything. The only thing I can change is how I respond to the situation. Once I accept that the waves are going to continue to roll in, I can choose to step back so they don’t reach me, or I can enter the water and jump over them or dive through them. It’s up to me what I do next. But whatever I do, my decision will come from a peaceful place because I’ve stopped railing against what is. If I’m upset and stuck in wishing things were different, it’s almost impossible to make a wise decision on how to proceed.
So in that moment, I decided that my clogged ear was acceptable because it was. Over the next few days it became less and less clogged. I still feel my eardrum pulsing in time with my heartbeat once in a while (even as I type this), but it has become less and less often. I trust one day soon it will be completely clear and I will forget all about it. In the meantime, I could ask more empowering questions like, what is this teaching me? What don’t I want to hear? How can I shift back to love?
Is there something in your life that you have declared unacceptable? What would it feel like to stop fighting it for a moment and simply accept that it is happening? Then, from that newfound place of peace, ask for guidance on how to proceed. It’s simple, but not always easy. If you could use some assistance, now is a great time to sign up for Life Coaching or attend a Family Constellations workshop. Both will help bring you to a place of acceptance and greater understanding. That naturally leads to compassion for yourself and others. Please visit my website for more information or contact me directly if you have specific questions. I love sharing what has worked for me!
Until next time, may you accept whatever is happening and know the deeper truth that all is well.