Just Smile and Wave

We can learn so much from kids. I love when I pass the train at Hermann Park and dozens of little hands wave at me. They don’t know me. Our paths will probably never cross again, yet they still reach for that fleeting moment of human connection. Of course, I’m one of those guys who waves back at them. I remember the joy of getting a response when I was a kid. Most adults seemed too busy to notice my attempt at connection.

Now that I’m an adult, (although some would argue that point) I still look for ways to connect with my fellow human beings. While walking in the park, I like to smile or nod at the strangers I pass. About 90% of the time I get a smile or a nod back. Yesterday, a man sitting on a bench while his kids played in the grass noticed me watching them as I walked by. He gave me a friendly wave which I returned in kind. We all just want to be seen, and it takes so little effort to produce that instant of human connection and happiness.

Earlier in the week, a family of four walked by me while I was under a tree doing the Donna Eden 5-Minute Daily Energy Routine. The parents didn’t seem to notice me tapping my fingertips on various parts of my torso, but the small boy and his little sister stared at me like there were 3 alien heads sprouting above my shoulders. The little girl, who couldn’t have been more than 2 or 3 years old, continued to watch me with the most troubled look on her face long after she passed. What was that crazy man doing under that tree?

When I finished tapping, I decided to wave at her. The troubled look that had been frozen on her face melted into a huge grin and she began vigorously waving her tiny hand at me. Just like that, her curiosity and concern turned into joy and connection. That crazy man under the tree wasn’t so bad after all. It was such a sweet moment. I laughed as she wobbled on her merry little way while her mother pulled her along to other adventures. What a gift she gave me. 

This week, I encourage you to follow the example of children. Smile more at your fellow human beings. Maybe even wave when appropriate. You might make someone’s day, and that someone could be you!

Are you having a difficult time making connections or experiencing joy? It would be my great honor to assist you with a series of Life Coaching sessions or a private Family Constellations session. Both can help you identify and move past the obstacles that keep you from the happy, healthy life you were meant to live. If you are ready to have a different experience of life, look around my website or send me an email for more information and to schedule a session.

Until next time, just smile and wave!

When you meet anyone, remember it is a holy encounter. As you see him you will see yourself. As you treat him you will treat yourself. As you think of him you will think of yourself. Never forget this, for in him you will find yourself or lose yourself.

A Course in Miracles – T-8:III.4

Drop the Leash

Once in a while, I hear something too good not to share. That happened last week at Unity of Houston during the Sunday morning study group for A Course in Miracles. We were talking about the false but prevalent idea that to be happy, we need others to act a certain way. The ego tells us if only they would change, then we can be at peace. I don’t know about you, but this hasn’t worked so well for me in the past.

The insightful woman sitting next to me shared that her dog has been a wonderful teacher for her on this subject. Sometimes this spirited little dog is not very interested in doing what she wants her to do. On walks when other dogs are present, she often finds herself struggling with the leash trying to control her dog.

She realized that there were many people in her life that she also had “on a leash,” trying to make them do what she wanted them to do. With so many leashes going in so many different directions, it’s easy to get all tangled up. Her solution was simple. Drop the leashes. Let those people go their own way and live their own lives. That’s how she gets untangled and returns to peace. I thought this was a brilliant analogy!

I know this is sometimes easier said than done, especially when someone we love is making choices we feel are not healthy. I struggled with this most of my life as I watched my mother’s addiction wreak havoc in her life (and often mine.) It took me many years to learn how to set healthy boundaries with her, like simply choosing not to be around her when she was drinking. Once I stopped trying to change her, our relationship improved, peace returned, and I was untangled!

If you are in a situation like this, I highly recommend Al-Anon Family Groups. They have a long history of providing help and hope for families and friends of alcoholics. Al-Anon  groups were part of my healing journey, and I still use the tools I learned there. If you would like some one-on-one assistance, I would be honored to help you with a series of Life Coaching sessions or a private Family Constellations session. Both will help you let go of those leashes and set strong, healthy boundaries. Look around my website or send me an email for more information and to schedule an appointment.

Until next time, may you experience the peace that comes from dropping those leashes!

As you release, so will you be released. Forget this not, or love will be unable to find you and comfort you.

A Course in Miracles – T-16:VI.2

Messenger in a Makeshift Meadow

Sometimes life gives me the simplest of examples to remind me that changing my perspective changes my experience. Most would describe the view from the third-floor bedroom window of our new home as not very attractive. This window overlooks the patched-up roof of the neighboring two-story apartment building strewn with an assortment of air conditioning units of different shapes and sizes. It’s not exactly postcard or Instagram worthy.

However, that roof is surrounded by a multitude of old, majestic trees. On any given day there are doves, pigeons, and mocking birds flying from tree branch to tree branch. Many times a splash of color will catch my eye in the form of a bright red cardinal or blue jay. One morning, I watched a beautiful yellow butterfly flit around those air conditioning units before making its way right up to the window where I stood with my mouth hanging open. It felt like such a gift of grace! 

The other day I was doing my morning stretches facing that window when suddenly a red-tailed hawk soared across the rooftop. I couldn’t believe my eyes! The fact that hawk is “messenger” in Native American teachings is not lost on me. I got the message. Apparently, the birds and butterflies don’t mind those unsightly metal monsters on the tapestry of gray roofing materials surrounded by trees. They see it as a makeshift meadow in the middle of the urban sprawl known as Houston, Texas. If they can see it that way, I guess I can too! Before I saw ugliness. Now I love looking out that window to see what beautiful surprises await me.

Could you use some assistance in changing your perspective so you can have a different experience? I would be honored to help you during a series of Life Coaching sessions or with a private Family Constellations session. Thanks to the miracle of technology, sessions can be done from anywhere in the world. Please look around my website or send me an email for more information and to schedule a session. 

Until next time, may you find numerous ways to shift your perspective to experience the ordinary world with a new sense of wonder!

Therefore, seek not to change the world, but choose to change your mind about the world. Perception is a result and not a cause.

A Course in Miracles – T-21:In.1

When Spirit Moves You

A few months after I moved to Houston, it became apparent that the open, loft-style floor plan of the townhouse my partner was renting was not ideal for two people with different lifestyles. Since I often work from home, I also needed a dedicated office space with privacy to do Life Coaching and individual Family Constellations sessions. Thus, during the fall of last year, we casually began looking for a new space to call home. 

We really enjoyed living in the Museum District, so we started going to open houses in our neighborhood. One of the first ones we went to was a quirky, extravagantly tech-wired home just around the corner from us. As the realtor talked about the complicated lighting and sound system, it dawned on her that her description was not enticing us to buy that house. She jokingly admitted this fact in her next sentence, and we all had a good laugh about it. Complicated technology aside, this wasn’t the house for us, but that realtor made a lasting impression.

Over a month passed, and my partner and I decided it was time to get serious about finding a new home. Picking a realtor was challenging because we knew a lot of them in our spiritual community. How could we choose one and explain why we didn’t choose the others? That candid realtor at the quirky house kept crossing my mind, so I asked my partner what he thought about contacting her. He also had a really good feeling about her so we listened to our intuition and reached out to her. Following that inspiration was one of the best decisions we have ever made together. 

During the next six months, we went looking at homes with Catherine Wintz at least a dozen times, and each time was a delight. In addition to her sense of humor and easy going nature, Catherine was very knowledgeable. She worked for a builder for many years before becoming a realtor so she was able to point out construction details that we might not have noticed. Each outing was filled with great insights and lots of laughter, just like our first encounter with her.

One of my favorite moments with Catherine happened as we were leaving one house heading to another. The next house was located in a neighborhood Catherine was not particularly fond of, so as we exited the house she said, “The great thing about this next neighborhood is…” And then she paused briefly before saying, “I’ve got about thirty seconds to think of something great about that neighborhood!” We all had another big laugh, which incidentally gave her a few more seconds to come up with something, which she did.

About three months into the search, we felt like we were getting close to making an offer on a home, but then ran into an unforeseen obstacle. Catherine had spent so much time with us and now we had to put everything on hold. When we told her the news, she wasn’t discouraged one bit. She simply said, “Let’s just keep looking and when that obstacle is cleared you’ll have a better idea of what’s out there.” What a gracious answer. 

She was also quite correct. We kept looking, that obstacle cleared, and just days later we found the perfect house. Not only did this house check off all the items on our “must have” list, it also had all but one of the items on our “would love to have” list. Although this house had been on the market for quite some time, it was out of our price range so it never appeared in our searches. During the delay, the owner dropped the price significantly so it suddenly popped up in our searches. Looking back on the entire process, we see the way everything fell into place as nothing short of a miracle. However you look at it, I recommend that when Spirit moves you, listen to those nudges, go with the flow, surrender to the process, and trust that the outcome will be better than you could have imagined!

Would you like to experience a miracle in your life? Could you use some help in trusting your intuition to guide you to an amazing outcome? It would be my great honor to assist you with a series of Life Coaching sessions or an individual Family Constellations session. Both can help you shift from fear to love around any situation that is trying to take away your peace. Please visit my website or reply to this email for more information and to schedule a session. And if Spirit is nudging you to reach out to Catherine, her website is WintzSellsHomes.com.

Until next time, may Spirit moves you to miraculous experiences every day!

What would You have me do?

Where would You have me go?

What would You have me say, and to whom?

I ask Spirit these three questions from Lesson 71 in A Course in Miracles every morning.