Healing Nurturing Love

This week marks the tenth anniversary of the tragic Sandy Hook Elementary School shooting. One of my “forgiveness heroes” is Scarlett Lewis, the mother of Jessie Lewis, who lost his life protecting fellow classmates on that sad day in December of 2012. I first learned about Scarlett and her work in 2016 when she was a guest on a radio show that I regularly listened to. She and the host were discussing how we constantly tell kids what not to do: 

“Stop squirming in your seat. Don’t hit your classmate. Say no to drugs.” 

But rarely do we tell them what they can do when they are feeling anxious, angry, or overwhelmed. Scarlett pointed out that young kids having a difficult time don’t raise their hands in class and say, “Excuse me, Ms. Johnson. I am experiencing a lot of strong emotions that I do not know how to process. Could I please schedule an appointment with you and the guidance counselor to discuss this at your earliest convenience?” No, but they do let us know in other ways if we are observant. When given some basic tools, kids can learn to navigate these feelings. Scarlett co-created such a tool kit, but I’ll come back to that in a minute.

After hearing that interview, I purchased Scarlett’s powerful book titled Nurturing Healing Love: A Mother’s Journey of Hope & Forgiveness. And what an inspiring journey it was and continues to be! The book is full of remarkable stories leading up to that awful day, as well as the many messages she has received from Jesse since his passing. The title came from three words Jesse wrote on a chalkboard just days before the shooting: nurturing healing love. Scarlett did not notice the chalkboard until after her son’s death. Because these words were not typical for him (or any first grader for that matter), she knew it was a special message from Jesse instructing her how to carry on after the tragedy. These words inspired her to start the Jesse Lewis Choose Love Movement to teach kids what they can do when they are anxious, angry, or overwhelmed. The following words are directly from her website.

  1. Nurturing means loving kindness and gratitude.
  2. Healing means forgiveness.
  3. Love is compassion in action.

The Choose Love Formula™ is based on the profound result of practicing the character values inherent in “Nurturing Healing Love,” which are:
Courage + Gratitude + Forgiveness + Compassion in Action.

These four character values are easy to learn. When practiced, they strengthen the health and resilience of individuals, improve the community and culture of groups and promote a safer, more peaceful and loving world. She realized that love, connection, and belonging are universal wants and needs that connect all of humanity, and that if the shooter had received more of them in his life, the tragedy might never have happened. Scarlett set out on a mission to teach as many people around the world about this message, beginning with children.

Rather than analyzing the details of this and other mass shootings and looking for someone to blame, Scarlett chose to focus her attention on a solution. The fact that she eventually found compassion for the young man who killed her son is indeed a miracle. While not condoning his actions or that of any other perpetrator of violent crimes, she realized that not choosing love would keep her stuck in the pain of that horrible December day. It really touched me when she said she believes there were 28 victims that day, not the usual 26 associated with the Sandy Hook tragedy. She includes the shooter and his mother who also died that day. This is the kind of compassion that can change the world to one where love and peace prevail.

I know it’s a heavy topic and may not be for everyone, but I highly recommend Scarlett’s book, Nurturing Healing Love. The overall message is one of hope, not despair. With honesty, tenderness, and courage, she shares what happened, her healing process, and the many miracles that have occurred through it all. In fact, I had my own little miracle while reading this book. I finished reading it on June 30, which I found out in one of the last chapters is Jesse’s birthday. When I made this connection, I got that tingling sensation all through my body. It felt like Jesse had just recruited me to help share his message of nurturing healing love. I can’t think of a better birthday or holiday gift to him than to choose love and help others do the same. 

If you’d like to learn more about Scarlett Lewis and the Jessie Lewis Choose Love Movement, click this link. And if I can be of assistance in helping you choose love during this often stressful and sometimes lonely holiday season, please don’t hesitate to reach out for a Spiritual Coaching Session or private Family Constellations Session. Except for December 24 & 25, I will be doing sessions through the end of the year. You can also join our weekly online A Course in Miracles study group every Tuesday at 7 PM Eastern / 4 PM Pacific. We will be sharing some holiday miracles on Tuesday, December 27 at our regular time so join us if you can!

This holiday season, no matter what appears to be happening in the world of form, may you find ways to choose nurturing healing love…especially for yourself!

What is kept apart from love cannot share its healing power, because it has been separated off and kept in darkness. 

A Course in Miracles ~ T-14.VI.2:4

The Relentless Sandpiper

My Sunday morning beach walks truly feed my soul. I love the expansiveness I feel while strolling along the sparkling turquoise water that extends past the horizon as sea breezes swirl around me. It’s also very grounding to feel my feet sink into the soft, wet sand as the waves roll in and out. 

Lately, I’ve been listening to the Miracle Voices podcast while I walk. During this hour-long podcast, other A Course in Miracles students share their journey with the Course and their stories of forgiveness. It’s a perfect combo because it enhances my expansive experience by expanding my mind. The last two episodes (#64 and #65) have been particularly inspiring. 

But the lessons I learn from the podcast aren’t the only ones I receive on the beach. Last summer, while walking along Ormond Beach, I watched a small group of sandpipers dodging waves while digging for small crustaceans in the sand. I noticed one sandpiper got very irate any time another bird got within 3 feet of him. He puffed himself up and charged at the intruders aggressively to scare them away. He was relentless!

Although his strategy was effective at scaring them away, it occurred to me that he was investing a lot of time chasing away other sandpipers when he could be using that time to find food. It’s a big beach with enough crustaceans to feed all of the sandpipers. Why was he so concerned about other birds getting close to him? None of the other sandpipers seemed to have an issue with sharing their part of the beach.

As I continued to watch the show, it occurred to me how many times I have acted similarly to that sandpiper. Instead of focusing on what I need to do, I’ve let myself be distracted by what others are doing. Anytime I judge someone for making a choice that I would not make, I’m just like that sandpiper. When I hold onto resentments toward someone for what they did or did not do, I’m like that sandpiper. Even when I compare myself to others, I’m like that sandpiper. If I stop thinking about the person or situation that I find upsetting, I will return to peace. It may sound overly simple, but it works. Try it for yourself.

Yes, sometimes there is an action step being asked of me before I can move forward. But most of the time, it’s all in my mind. What a magnificent teacher (and unpleasant reflection) that feisty little sandpiper turned out to be. Since then, whenever I catch myself being more concerned with what someone else is doing rather than focusing on what I need to do, I picture that puffed-up little guy charging at his “enemies” but barely enjoying breakfast. Hopefully, this image will make me laugh and help me bring the focus back to where it belongs.

Do you often find yourself being like that relentless sandpiper? It would be my great honor to help you put the focus back on you and return to peace with a series of Spiritual Coaching sessions or a private Family Constellations Session. For more information about both, please visit JohnHaroldMoore.com. You can also schedule a session or purchase a gift certificate for a loved one by visiting my website or by sending me an email

Until next time, I encourage you to focus on what’s yours to do and let the other sandpipers do their own thing. 

He who would not forgive must judge, for he must justify his failure to forgive.

A Course in Miracles ~ W.pII.1.4:4

The Hardest Person to Forgive

Who is the hardest person to forgive? It’s probably not that politician that makes your blood boil or that person you feel betrayed you years ago. For most of us, the hardest person to forgive is ourself. This past weekend I had an opportunity to practice. 

On Saturday, a dear friend and her family drove up from Naples to have dinner with me in Sarasota. Her 4-year-old son was extremely well-behaved on the drive up and at dinner, so we decided to get a treat before they headed home. Okay, maybe the adults were just looking for an excuse to get gelato. Suddenly, the skies opened up and released buckets of rain as we drove across the Ringling Bridge to St. Armands Circle where my favorite gelato shop is located. Mother Nature was not going to make our quest for dessert easy, but we were willing to persevere and wait for the storm to pass.

Eventually, the rain let up, and my friend found a parking spot in a public lot around the corner from the gelato shop. Since I already had the parking app on my phone, I said I would be happy to pay for our parking. The rain continued to fall lightly, so we huddled under her umbrella as I added her license plate to my account. I paid for an hour using the location code on the sign directly in front of her parking spot. Once it was confirmed, off we went for gelato.

By the time we finished our tasty frozen treats, the rain had all but stopped, so we took a brief stroll around the shops of St. Armands Circle. We had just arrived at a candy store when I noticed that our parking was about to expire. Rather than risk a parking ticket, I used the app to extend our time in the parking lot. That’s one of the best features of those parking apps. Having been extremely mindful to avoid a parking ticket, imagine my shock when we discovered one on the windshield when we returned to the car! How could that be? I added money to cover the extra time!

My heart sank when I looked closely at my receipt on the app. I had typed a “4” instead of a “3” when entering her license plate number. I slightly misplaced tap of my finger caused a $63 expense. I was so mad at myself for not double-checking the license plate number before I hit “Start Parking.” I did not want this unfortunate incident to spoil our fun evening so I did my best to put it out of my mind. There was nothing I could do about it now, but I would certainly try to correct my mistake later.

Before they left, I took a photo of the citation and told my friend I would take care of it since it was my mistake. As soon as I got home, I went to the parking website to file an appeal. I wish I could tell you that once I explained what happened and provided evidence with the screenshot of my receipt, they waived the ticket. Unfortunately, that’s not what happened. After a few email exchanges and a phone call, I learned that the parking lot was not connected to the parking app. Even though the back of that sign was directly in front of the space where my friend parked her car, it was not associated with the parking lot. Apparently, we were supposed to pay somewhere else.

True, I could probably make a case for why the ticket should be waived and continue fighting, but is it worth it? I had already spent quite a bit of time and energy on it. My friend is also a teacher and student of A Course in Miracles, and we both agreed we would rather just pay the ticket and return to peace more quickly. If we paid it within 4 days, they would reduce the fee to $43. We agreed to split the cost, so I consider it a $21.50 lesson. 

What lesson, you might ask? Well, there are a few. On a practical level, I won’t make the same mistake if I ever park in that parking lot again. However, after this experience, I don’t think I will. More importantly, I realized I was beating myself up for hitting the wrong number on my phone when even if I had typed in the correct number, we still would have received a parking ticket. All those unforgiving thoughts were a waste of time. According to the Course, that’s always true of unforgiving thoughts. I could have used that time to think loving thoughts instead, and I surely would have felt better. 

Here’s something else to ponder. What if the roles were reversed and my friend had been the one who entered the wrong license plate number? Would I have said to her some of the things I was saying to myself in my mind? Certainly not! I would have been much more kind knowing it truly was not a big deal. To me, this is the most important lesson. The next time you make a mistake that feels stupid or unforgivable, can you treat yourself with as much kindness as you would treat a dear friend who made the same mistake? I’m going to do my best to remember that in the future. 

If you would like some assistance in forgiving yourself, it would be my great honor to help you see things from a kinder, broader perspective with a series of Spiritual Coaching sessions or a private Family Constellations session. Both can help you release unloving thoughts and replace them with peaceful ones. Look around my website for more information and to book a session. Send me an email if you have questions or would like to schedule a 15-minute introductory Zoom call to see which type of session would be best for you. 

Until next time, please be gentle with yourself…

Fear binds the world. Forgiveness sets it free.

A Course in Miracles ~ W-332

Forgiveness Sets Me Free

It’s no secret that I love the spiritual document known as A Course in Miracles. One of its foundational principles is forgiveness, and it has indeed set me free from many painful experiences. The Course frames the concept of forgiveness in similar yet very different ways from other spiritual traditions. It would be impossible to fully explain the nuances here, but if you are curious, please join one of our weekly online A Course in Miracles Study Groups! One aspect of the Course’s version of forgiveness is described in the passage below from Chapter 27 in the text:  

Dream of your brother’s kindnesses instead of dwelling in your dreams on his mistakes. Select his thoughtfulness to dream about instead of counting up the hurts he gave. Forgive him his illusions, and give thanks to him for all the helpfulness he gave. And do not brush aside his many gifts because he is not perfect in your dreams. T-27.VII.15:3-6

As with many of the concepts in the Course, it’s simple but not always easy. If there is a great deal of trauma around an incident or something occurred very recently, it may not be possible to think about the kindnesses of the person or persons we believe harmed us. And that’s okay. Healing is a process that can only begin when the time is right. You will know when that time comes when you think or say something like “there has to be a better way” or “I don’t want to feel like this anymore.”

When you are ready, that passage is inviting us to stop thinking about and retelling the story of the terrible thing that someone did or did not do. Instead, call to mind something kind they once did or some good quality about this person, no matter how small. When we shift our focus and release the unforgiving thoughts, we are the ones who feel better. 

Perhaps you have heard some version of the quote: “Holding on to resentments is like drinking poison and expecting someone else to die.” We know poison doesn’t work that way. Like poison, my resentments and judgments only harm me. I will not be able to experience peace as long as I hold onto unforgiving thoughts. 

This doesn’t mean I condone harmful actions or suggest you let others abuse or take advantage of you. If you are in a situation where you are being harmed in any way, please make the most loving choice for yourself and leave that situation as soon as possible. If you find yourself in a situation where you are the one causing harm, I encourage you to seek professional help or spiritual counsel so you can uncover and release your own pain.

Why am I sharing all this in my email this week? Like many of you, I was shocked by the incident that happened between Will Smith and Chris Rock at the Academy Awards Ceremony on Sunday night. It has been the topic of much discussion this week, and there are a lot of different opinions and viewpoints out there. I’m assuming you have access to the internet if you’re reading this so you know what happened. If not, you might be better off keeping it that way. 

Personally, I do not think violence is ever an appropriate or beneficial choice when dealing with conflict. I also believe making jokes at another person’s expense is not kind. A Course in Miracles teaches that attack thoughts, whether we act on them or not, are always harmful. And when we express them with words or fists, they never produce loving, harmonious, or peaceful results. Though in the grand scheme of things it was a minor incident, the ripples of disharmony and pain from that small act extended well beyond the walls of the Dolby Theatre and out into the world. I trust the conversations that are happening will be learning opportunities for us all. 

Like many, I was very upset by what I saw, but I have learned that it is not for me to judge who is right, who is wrong, or what “should” have happened. No matter what the situation, my job is always to forgive and extend love. I’m so grateful to have remembered the above passage from  A Course in Miracles. It helped me remember the time that Will Smith appeared on The Ellen Degeneres Show in 2019 to surprise and commend two high school football players for making the loving choice to stop bullying a classmate and collect new clothes for him instead. You can watch the whole story about the high school students by clicking this link.

It may seem ironic to hear Will Smith’s words to the boys now, but I choose to believe this is the true version of him. It’s indicative of “the man he wants to be” as he wrote in his apology to Chris Rock on Instagram. Again, I do not condone his actions on that night. However, I know there have been plenty of times when I acted from ego and made choices that I’m not proud of. I pray when it happens again (and it inevitably will!) that I’m not on live TV in front of millions of people. May we all hold our judgment of right and wrong for just a moment and extend love to everyone that has been affected by this incident. And while we are at it, let’s do the same for anyone who is currently experiencing pain, suffering, anger, or fear anywhere in the world.

Family Constellations and Spiritual Coaching based on A Course in Miracles are both excellent ways to help you free yourself from the past and move forward with clarity and grace. If you would like to experience more peace and harmony in your life, please look around my website to book a session or get more information. 

The next online Family Constellations Workshop is happening next Saturday, April 9 from 2-5 PM Eastern. We will be “Releasing Patterns Under the Full Moon” to prepare you for your own Full Moon Release Ceremony the following weekend. There are only a few spaces left, so click this link to purchase your ticket today.  

This week, if you’re ready, I encourage you to try releasing a hurt and remember a kindness, even if it’s a tiny one. That small act will be a big step toward your freedom! 

A Dream of Forgiveness

Have you ever had one of those dreams that is undeniably your unconscious mind working out some stuff while you sleep? I had one of those last weekend. In the dream, my mom was still alive and she was quite inebriated. If you know my story, you know this would not be unusual for my mother. However, I seemed to be reliving the moment when I discovered she had fallen off the wagon after a long stretch of sobriety shortly after moving to Florida. Both then and in the dream, I was devastated. In the dream, I could feel my frustration and anger building as I shared the upsetting news with my brother.

As happens in dreams, time was not linear. Suddenly, I was watching various moments throughout the last years of my mother’s life. Specifically, times when I lost my patience and said or did things that were not kind were on display. Reliving these events all at once caused an overwhelming wave of guilt and remorse to wash over me. In the dream, I began to sob profusely. My pillow wasn’t soaked when I woke up, but it would not have surprised me if it had been. Those emotions felt very real.

My mother has been gone for almost 11 years now. I’ve done a lot of inner work since then, but I know that dream helped me release yet another layer of sadness and guilt that had been lurking in my unconscious mind. There are always more layers of that onion to peel. I’m grateful to A Course in Miracles and Family Constellations for helping me understand that I did the best I could with what I knew back then. If I want to experience more peace, love, and joy in my life, I need to let go of the guilt and forgive myself for the past, knowing I would do things differently today.

Is there something you are having a hard time forgiving yourself for? Maybe it’s too painful to process in your waking hours. It might be helpful to ask your higher self, guardian angels, or loved ones in Spirit to watch over you at night and help you release anything that no longer serves while you sleep. When you’re ready to try it during waking hours, please reach out for assistance. I would be honored to walk with you on your healing journey with a series of Spiritual Coaching Sessions or a Private Family Constellations Session. Both are excellent ways to give the forgiveness process a boost. Look around my website for more information and to book a session

May a host of heavenly angels lift any heavy thoughts up to the clouds tonight while you sleep peacefully. 

All your time is spent in dreaming. Your sleeping and your waking dreams have different forms, and that is all. 

A Course in Miracles ~ T-18.II.5:12-13

Release with Love

Long-time readers of my weekly stories will not be surprised by the news I am about to share. I moved back to Florida this week! After 3 years of living in Houston, Texas, I heeded the call to return to the place that feels like home. Houston is a wonderful city with much to offer, it just wasn’t a good fit for me. My preference is to live in a much smaller city with a tropical climate near the ocean. During the 25 years I lived in Florida before moving to Texas, I would often remind myself, “I’m not on vacation, I live here!” And now with a smile in my heart, I can say that again with even deeper gratitude.

Before I drove east, I had the opportunity to practice what I preach and do something I often recommend to my Family Constellations clients. The night I officially made the decision to leave Texas, I went to my rooftop deck to get some fresh air and look out over the Houston skyline. As I stared at its twinkling lights against a gray, cloudy background, it occurred to me that the two of us needed to have a conversation. To be fair, I did most of the talking. I stood up, faced the city with my hands in prayer position, and said these words:

“Dear Houston. We have had an interesting 3 years together. You have been overwhelming at times. I have gotten lost in your streets and trapped in your traffic. Yes, in moments of sheer frustration, I have even cursed you! And I have also been richly blessed by you. I have met incredible people and made lifelong friends. I have experienced moments of joy and sorrow. I have received excellent health care from your skilled medical professionals. I have helped heal many hearts in Houston with Family Constellations and A Course in Miracles which has helped heal my heart in return. Houston, you have been a significant part of my journey and I am grateful for all of it. And now I release you with love.”

Then I bowed deeply and slowly to downtown Houston to show my respect and gratitude. When I stood up, I felt a shift in my body, as if some heaviness were being lifted up and out of my being. While this was happening I took a deep breath to help integrate this new feeling of lightness. It surprised me how viscerally I felt this in my body. That feeling of lightness has stayed with me. Once I released Houston with love and appreciation, I was free to turn around and walk away with my focus on what lies ahead, not on what has passed. 

This powerful practice can be adapted to any situation or experience that is coming to an end: a job, a relationship, an illness, an old way of being. Simply choose an object or person to represent that which is complete and express whatever is in your heart making sure to acknowledge the blessings and the challenges. Complete the ritual by bowing slowly to the representative. By releasing it with love, you are honoring the part it played in your life, thus dissolving any sticky chords that keep you stuck in the past and unable to turn around and move toward the future. I often compare this inability to walking backward through a room full of furniture. You can do it, but you will likely trip over chairs and bump into tables because your attention is on what is behind you, not what is in front of you.

To all the wonderful people in Houston who welcomed me so warmly into your community and your hearts, I say thank you! It was a gift to share this time with you. Since the pandemic, the majority of my work is now online so we can stay connected through my weekly A Course in Miracles study groups, monthly Virtual Family Constellations Sessions, and right here in this weekly email. My apologies if I didn’t get to say farewell in person. Please know that you will always have a place in my heart.

Speaking of virtual workshops, I will be facilitating a special online event on Saturday, June 19, the day before Father’s Day, where we will be “Exploring the Role of Dad with Family Constellations.” Half the tickets have already been sold so if this sounds like something you’d like to experience, purchase your ticket soon! 

Later in July, I will be facilitating another special online event where we will “Declare Our Independence from Addiction with Family Constellations.” Addiction is an insidious thread woven into many family systems, including my own. I will share what I’ve learned from personal experience with people suffering from addictions and what I’ve seen during 8 years of facilitating this work. My goal is to shed some light on this dark disruptor and put it in its proper place. I have not selected a date for this one yet, so watch future emails or check the calendar page on my website. As always, if you’d like more information about these events, scheduling a one-on-one session, or my Life Coaching programs based on A Course in Miracles, simply send me an email or look around my website

Until next time, may you find meaningful ways to release things from your past with love and make room for the blessings that await you!

Put yourself not in charge of this, for you cannot distinguish between advance and retreat. Some of your greatest advances you have judged as failures, and some of your deepest retreats you have evaluated as success.

A Course in Miracles ~ T-18.V.1:5-6

When a Wrong Turn is a Right Turn

An interesting thing happened during a conversation with a friend this week. We were catching up and having a milkshake outside Becks Prime Restaurant on Kirby Drive when a white plastic bag floated down from the sky and landed on the table right between us. I believe I had just finished saying something like, “I’m waiting for a sign or guidance on what my next steps should be.” Seconds later the bag arrived. I laughed and said, “This must be my sign!” Printed on the bag was the name of a restaurant two blocks away called Grace’s. It felt like Spirit reminding me that grace is everywhere and given freely including the situation we were discussing. I don’t have to beg or plead with the Universe. My job is to make it welcome, not make it happen. What a magical and timely message!

What makes this event even more interesting is the back story. You see, we picked the place and time for this milkshake rendezvous weeks ago, but then I had to postpone it by a day which my friend graciously accommodated. Here’s the embarrassing part. Becks Prime has three locations in Houston. Even though I’m the one that suggested we meet at the one on Kirby, I drove to the wrong location! As soon as I pulled into the parking lot and didn’t see my friend’s car I realized my mistake. Sheepishly, I called to tell him what happened and asked if he still had time to meet. I knew it would take a while for me to get to the correct location in rush hour traffic. He said he had time, so I hopped back in my car and headed that way.

During the drive, I grumbled to myself for not being more mindful. My error meant that much of our time together would be lost while I sat in traffic. My inner critic (aka the ego) was having a field day with this situation. Luckily, the friend I was meeting is also a student of A Course in Miracles, so I knew he would forgive me. More importantly, I knew I had to forgive myself. I did my best to surrender to the situation and listen to the voice of love which reminded me that all was well despite outward appearances. When I arrived 45 minutes later we had a good laugh at my silly mistake and then left it behind to enjoy a delightful conversation and a delicious milkshake.

Later, when I reflected on the situation, the perfection of it all became crystal clear. Had we met at the other location, we would not have been near Grace’s Restaurant. Had I driven to the correct location in the first place, we probably would not have been sitting there when the bag landed on the table. Either way, I would have missed that important message from Spirit. As frustrating as it was, it turned out to be a wonderful opportunity to release self-judgment and forgive myself. And isn’t that grace?

Are you having a difficult time forgiving yourself or someone else? I would be honored to offer you the gift of grace with a series of Life Coaching Sessions. In our weekly 60-minute telephone or Zoom sessions, we will discuss ways to see things from a different perspective. I will also provide tools to help you release anxiety, judgment, and fear. If you are ready to experience more peace in your life, please visit my website or send me an email for more information and to book a session.

Until next time, may the gift of grace arrive in unexpected and magical ways…

Spirit is in a state of grace forever. Your reality is only spirit. Therefore you are in a state of grace forever.

A Course in Miracles ~ T-1.III.5:4

Harmless Waves

I received another lesson from Mother Nature this week. The Atlantic Ocean was particularly rough the other day when I jumped in to cool off after my beach walk. I came up for air just in time for a large wave to crash into my head. Another wave followed right behind the first, so I instinctively turned my head to avoid being hit directly in the face. That move allowed the wave to deliver a forceful smack to my right cheek. I started laughing when I realized that I just got slapped across the face by Mother Nature. Those aggressive waves continued to roll in one after the other, so to avoid further assault, I made the decision to dive head first into them.

As I continued to pierce the oncoming waves with my body, it occurred to me that these waves were just like fear. When I turn away from them or try to avoid them, they have the power to hurt me or even knock me down. When I face them head on and dive right in, I emerge on the other side unscathed. True, in some cases fear redirects us to keep us safe. If a tiger is coming at you, it is probably wise to turn around and go the other direction…quickly!
However, most fears are based on limiting beliefs and false perceptions of ourselves. For instance, if you aren’t confident that you have the skills necessary to do something else, you will think you won’t be able to pay your bills if you leave that unfulfilling job. If you don’t love yourself or feel worthy of love, you will wonder where you will get love if you leave that unhappy relationship. If you don’t believe you can always make another choice, you will think you made a big mistake if things don’t work out in that new city. These are good examples of F.E.A.R. – “False Evidence Appearing Real” or “Forgetting Everything’s All Right.”

Caution tells us to look both ways before crossing the street. Fear keeps us immobilized on the street corner. As long as I stood there trying to avoid those waves, they continued to pummel me. As soon as I became proactive and dove straight into them, they proved to be harmless. I am going to do my best to remember this lesson in the next few weeks and months. Currently there are some opportunities in my life and some decisions that need to be made that are bringing up some F.E.A.R. I wonder what will happen if I trust that everything will be all right and dive right into them?

Is fear keeping you from moving forward? Does it feel like the waves are pummeling you where you are? I would love to share some of the tools and techniques that have helped me dive in and come out the other side. Life Coaching and Family Constellations are great tools to help you move past fear and into the joyful life you were meant to live. Sessions can be done in person, by telephone, or via Skype. Please look around my website for more information about both. Perhaps that will be the first wave you pass through.

Until next time, may the love and light in your heart carry you safely through even the biggest of waves.

Angel’s Window

“Let me be still and listen to the truth.” This was my daily lesson on Tuesday from A Course in Miracles. The timing was perfect because I knew I was listening to the lies of the ego over the weekend. How did I know? On Sunday I was feeling a little sad and disconnected. I got back on track during our weekly Miracle Monday study group, but started to feel out of sorts again by Wednesday, this time with a slight headache and upset stomach too. Before heading to my next client, I allowed myself to be still for a few minutes on my bed with a heating pad on my neck to let the physical and mental discomfort pass. I stopped resisting and just surrendered to it. When I felt a little better, I decided to read something inspirational, so I picked up The Holy Encounter newsletter, a bimonthly A Course in Miracles publication from the Miracle Distribution Center. I received the latest issue in the mail on Friday, but hadn’t looked at it yet. Imagine my surprise when the headline of the very first article on the front page read “Let Me Be Still and Listen to the Truth.” Apparently Spirit really wanted me to get this message! Taking a moment to be still and listen to the truth was exactly what I needed to do. The words of the Course reminded me that peace, love, and joy abide in me. I can never be separate from my Source or these qualities.

I had a spontaneous moment of remembrance of this truth about ten years ago when I first started studying the Course. I was hiking with my partner at the time at the North Rim of the Grand Canyon. We found an awe inspiring place aptly named Angel’s Window. I can easily imagine angels congregating there to look at the view from that window. It was a natural arch overlooking the canyon who’s cut out section revealed part of the Colorado River. To walk out on the plateau above that window provided not only a breathtaking view but an other worldly experience.

We arrived late in the day as the sun was setting. The canyon was spectacularly illuminated in golden yellows and pale pink hues. There weren’t many others around, so it felt like we had that gorgeous spot all to ourselves. In fact, we took turns allowing each other to have a private moment on the ledge while the other snapped a few pictures from across the ravine with my new digital camera. When it was my turn to have a moment perched on top of Angel’s Window, the wind picked up and swirled all around me in the vastness that is the Grand Canyon. I felt simultaneously like a very tiny part of something huge as well as a deep connection to all that is. It was a wonderful sensation and I savored every moment of it. While I was still, the gusts of wind danced around me whispering: “You are part of something beyond measure and there is a powerful force all around you.” This felt like truth.

If you are feeling disconnected in this moment, then you are probably listening to the lies of the ego like I was. One great remedy is a visit to Angel’s Window. However, if that’s not feasible at this time, it would be my great honor to be like those gusting winds and remind you of the truth with a Life Coaching or Family Constellations session. Look around my website or send me an email for more information about both. Perhaps now is the time for a breath of fresh air!

Until next time, try to to take a moment at least once or twice every day to be still and listen to the truth. It will indeed set you free!

Got it in a Flash!

Messages from Spirit can show up anywhere. Sometimes they show up in a flash. I have been a fan of the superhero called the Flash since I was a kid. For those of you who may not be familiar with the Flash, he has super speed and can run so fast that he is able to travel backward and forward in time. I have always been fascinated by the concept of time travel and multiple realities. I think having a subscription to The Flash comic book when I was a teenager prepared me well for some of the mind-bending concepts in A Course in Miracles.

I was curious to see how or if the writers would handle these concepts in The Flash TV series on the CW Network. **SPOILER ALERT** In the first two episodes of Season 3, I believe the writers did a remarkable job exploring them. Filled with overwhelming grief over events that happened in the finale of Season 2, the Flash travels back in time to prevent certain tragic events from occurring when he was a boy.  By doing so he can experience a different outcome in the present. The new life he creates is a happy one at first, until he discovers that, by changing the past, he has inadvertently created pain and suffering in the present lives of his close friends. Unable to enjoy his own happiness while his friends suffer, the Flash travels back in time once again to “make things right.” It appears that he has restored the sequence of events to how they were, until he returns to the present and realizes that things are still slightly different. Now he is faced with a dilemma. Should he tell his friends what he has done or just keep quiet?

When things seem to fall apart yet again in this new timeline, in desperation, the Flash races back in time once more to repair things. That’s when another time traveling speedster who has been observing the Flash intervenes. He knocks the Flash off course in order to deliver a profound piece of advice. (It was a message that I needed to be reminded of as well.) Speaking from experience, he tells the Flash that going back in time will never “fix” things. Using a coffee cup to demonstrate, he breaks a piece off and explains that the coffee cup will never be the same. Even if you glue the piece back in place, the crack will remain. Once something is done it’s done. The best thing you can do is accept what happened, accept the way things are, and move on from there. You can only go forward. This message reminded me of a definition of forgiveness that I heard on an episode of Oprah Winfrey’s Life Class years ago.

Forgiveness is giving up the hope that the past could be any different.
Recently I made a decision that had a far greater impact on people I care about than I had anticipated. Out of respect for those involved, I won’t go into the details, but it was something that I had been praying about for quite some time. When I received clear guidance, I took action. I was very mindful to come from a loving place when I spoke, but despite my efforts, that was not how it was received. Looking back, I see there were things I could have done differently. If I had super speed, I might be tempted to travel back in time to change things. I don’t have super speed, but I do have super trust. I trust in the divine perfection that everything happened how it was supposed to for the highest good of all, despite outward appearances. I could choose to keep looking backward, wishing things were different. Or I could choose to move forward and see this experience as an opportunity for self-reflection, learning, and growth. I think I’ll go with the second choice.

Is there something you wish you could travel back in time to change? Could you use some help moving forward? It would be my great honor to share with you some of the tools and techniques that have worked for me when I have felt stuck. I offer four, six, and eight week Life Coaching programs based on the strong principles of A Course in Miracles to help you through any challenging time. Family Constellations is another great way to let go of things from the past and move forward. I offer private sessions in person, by phone, or Skype, or you can join me for an upcoming group event. It is an experience like no other. Please look around my website for more information about all of these opportunities.
I know it can be challenging, but when we stop going back in time to that painful event or circumstance and begin to move forward again with an open heart, that’s when love can arrive in a flash.

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